Saturday, August 13, 2005

Firewalls

Grace, fear and freedom- big themes to a believer who wants to truly be what she talks about. Why grace and fear in the same breath? If grace leads to freedom and fear leads to lack of freedom, could these two opposites possibly intersect?

Steph has a very good discussion of this (Aug. 8.) She suggests we put conditions on receiving grace, thereby saying we fear freedom. Hmm... I agree. But does that make any sense? Certainly not from an objective standpoint. It would not make sense to fear freedom; freedom is good. But from a subjective, experiential perspective it rings true. I mean it should ring true as to the falseness of what we are believing! It points out a lie is lurking in our mind. What we believe acts like an effective firewall against intrusion. If what we believe is mingled with fear-- say, fear of punishment, fear of rejection, fear of making a mistake or a wrong choice, then grace will have a hard time freeing us to believe and live in truth. There's something that we just don't get about grace. Could it be that grace demands that we trust love to be at its source?

I am not rewarded with grace because of an impeccable life. I cannot make all the right choices and decisions in order to walk into more freedom. Please sound the buzzer! That's head knowledge. I know that these are truths, but how do I behave? Too often I operate as though the future rests on my ability (alone) to make wise choices, not screw up and cause bad consequences to occur for myself and others. I need freedom from a faulty firewall that blocks the intrusion of grace, and worse, keeps me from knowing the source of it- the Intruder himself who is a person named Love. I do need a powerful firewall (based in truth) that quarantines lies that conflict with grace and freedom. I need a divine hacking of my code to loose a virus of perfect love. It not only overrides all fear, it casts it out.

I need my mind washed, my spirit renewed, my heart strengthened, and my friends to walk alongside me to encourage my soul as I grow in grace.

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